ABRAHAM, THE FRIEND OF GOD
Until Death Do Us Part
Message Preached 6/28/98
Genesis 23:1 And Sarah was an hundred and seven and twenty years old:
these were the years of the life of Sarah.
Genesis 23:2 And Sarah died in Kirjatharba; the same is Hebron in the land of
Canaan: and Abraham came to mourn for Sarah, and to weep for her.
1. And Sarah died in Kirjatharba
Sarah was 127 years old when she died. After
more than 100 years of marriage Sarah died. Abraham and Sarah had lived comfortably
together many years, but death parts those whom nothing else could part. Leaving Ur could
not part them. That move could have caused family problems. The change of life-style form
a house to living in a tent could not part them. The situation with Sarah and Pharaoh
could not part them. Abraham’s lying and Sarah’s willingness to go along with
the lie did not part them. The events that took place with Hagar and Abraham could not
part them. Abraham could have kept Hagar and rejected Sarah, but he did not. Ishmael could
not part them. This did cause problems for Abraham and Sarah, but they remained together.
The Sarah and Abimelech situation did not part them. Even though it seemed in the context
that Sarah enjoyed the attention from Abimelech, she stayed with Abraham. The taking of
Isaac to Moriah to sacrifice did not separate them. Nothing could separate them.
Were there times of fear and stress during
their marriage? Sure there were (1Pe 3:6; Gen 20:11) all the above situations could be
enough to cause serious marital problems. Peter writes of about the fear that Sarah
experienced. However, fear could not separate them.
1 Peter 3:6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose
daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. (KJV)
1 Peter 3:6 like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her
daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. (NIV)
Abraham and Sarah obviously were able to
communicate and get through a problem. They listened to each other and responded to each
other even if they did not agree. They made a marriage work until death did them part.
Notice how I said that. They made a marriage work. A marriage is made to work.
What do we learn from Abraham and Sarah as
covenant kingdom people concerning our marriages today thousands of years later? Most of
us will never experience in our marriages what Abraham and Sarah faced. They worked
through each problem. What we learn is just that--we work through marital problems. We
only allowing death to separate us. We all know there are exceptions, but the exceptions
should be seldom and not the rule.
2. Sarah died in Kirjatharba
It is not a pleasant thought, but do we ever
consider where we would like to die? Sarah died in the land promised to them by the Lord
God. This was the place they made their home. This is the place they made their witness.
This is the land they birthed their heritage. The Lord makes sure we are told where Sarah
died.. The reason is she died in her promise.
3. and Abraham came to mourn for Sarah, and to weep for her
Even the special friends and favorites of God
are not exempted from the stroke of death nor the hurt of it. When the loss of a loved one
is experienced we question God. We ask, “Why?”. There is no answer. There is
only a knowing that even God’s friend must deal with death.
We learned in Genesis chapters 4 and 5 that
Cain’s lineage was known for the worldly things accomplished. There is no mention of
their days lived before bringing their heritage seed. There is no mention of the days
Cain’s lineage lived after their heritage seed was born. There is no mention of the
length of their lives. Why should there be? They would only be destroyed by the flood. The
opposite is true for the promised lineage of Seth. All sorts of information is given about
Abel’s lineage concerning their days and their deaths. This is also true for Abraham
and Sarah. Her days are recorded. She accomplished the primary purpose of her life. She
gave birth to Isaac and she died a good old age of 127.
Abraham not only mourned for Sarah. He also did
“weep for her.” Abraham loved Sarah. She had been a good wife, friend,
and companion for Abraham for well over 100 years. We hear the tenderness of the Holy
Spirit as He records, “....and Abraham came to mourn for Sarah, and to weep for
her.”
Abraham came to mourn and to weep. His purpose
was to mourn and to weep. I guess sometimes we believers attempt to tell people they
should not weep because “the deceased is in a better place,” or “the
deceased is with the Lord” or “the deceased has gone home.” While all that
may be true, it does not eliminate the need to mourn and weep--even for Christians. There
is a void and a wound that can only be healed after mourning and weeping has taken place.
Genesis 23:3 And Abraham stood up from before his dead, and spake
unto the sons of Heth, saying,
Genesis 23:4 I am a stranger and a sojourner with you: give me a possession of a
buryingplace with you, that I may bury my dead out of my sight.
Genesis 23:4 "Here I am, a visitor in a foreign land, with no place to bury my wife.
Please sell me a piece of ground for this purpose." (TLB)
4. And Abraham stood up from before his dead
There is a time to mourn and to weep and we
have noted this with Abraham. There is also a time to stand up from before the dead and
move on. For some it may be sooner than for others. Lengthy times of mourning are not
healthy for the body or soul or spirit. People can actually mourn their self to death.
People can stop eating and damage their own body. The soul (mind) can become so depressed
that a mental disorder can occur. People can become bitter at God and damage their spirit.
It is dangerous to mourn too long. Proper mourning and weeping will aid in the healing.
Too much mourning and weeping will bring serious problems. Kingdom people will stand up
from before their dead and move on.
5. a possession of a buryingplace with you, that I may bury my dead
People ask me from time to time about the
proper method of Christian burial. They are usually inquiring concerning cremation verses
burial. I tell them that I know of no place in the scriptures where cremation is referred.
However, burial is not exactly the concept we have today of burial. Burial in the
scriptures was in a tomb or sepulchre.
The concept of the family cemetery, i.e. “buryingplace”
is nearly obsolete. A reason for this is the life styles we now live. People move all over
the country and earth establishing their own families. People are usually buried in the
cemetery of the last city they lived. Churches took up the “buryingplace”
cause, but that too has become nearly obsolete in many churches today. Abraham wanted a
place to bury his dead. He wanted his family together while living. He also wanted them
together when dead.
Genesis 23:5 And the children of Heth answered Abraham, saying unto him,
Genesis 23:6 Hear us, my lord: thou art a mighty prince among us: in the choice of our
sepulchres bury thy dead; none of us shall withhold from thee his sepulchre, but that
thou mayest bury thy dead.
Genesis 23:7 And Abraham stood up, and bowed himself to the people of the land, even to
the children of Heth.
Genesis 23:8 And he communed with them, saying, If it be your mind that I should bury my
dead out of my sight; hear me, and intreat for me to Ephron the son of Zohar,
Genesis 23:9 That he may give me the cave of Machpelah, which he hath, which is in
the end of his field; for as much money as it is worth he shall give it me for a
possession of a buryingplace amongst you.
6. thou art a mighty prince among us
Abraham carried a wonderful witness. His
neighbors saw Abraham as “a might prince” of a man. Because of their love
and respect for Abraham and Sarah people came to comfort Abraham and to mourn for and
honor Sarah in death.
I have presided over and been a part of many
funerals. It is always easy to differentiate those seen by their neighbors as a prince and
princess from the others. People will come and stand in line to pay their respect for one.
They will barely come at all for the other. I recently was a part of the officiants at a
funeral where it was impossible to get all the people into the room. The man was a prince
in his community.
A witness like that does not come easily. It is
obvious that much work and love and care had been released by Abraham and Sarah into their
region. People loved them and respected them and came to be with and honor the “mighty
prince” of a man Abraham and his deceased princess Sarah.
7. our sepulchres bury thy dead.... give me the cave of Machpelah
It is interesting that Abraham would not bury
his dead in their sepulchres of the heathen, though it was fine with them for Abraham to
bury his dead in theirs. I have no real answers for this. He simply would not bury his
dead with their dead even though it would have been free of any cost to Abraham.
Genesis 23:10 And Ephron dwelt among the children of Heth: and Ephron
the Hittite answered Abraham in the audience of the children of Heth, even of all that
went in at the gate of his city, saying,
Genesis 23:11 Nay, my lord, hear me: the field give I thee, and the cave that is
therein, I give it thee; in the presence of the sons of my people give I it thee:
bury thy dead.
Genesis 23:12 And Abraham bowed down himself before the people of the land.
Genesis 23:13 And he spake unto Ephron in the audience of the people of the land, saying,
But if thou wilt give it, I pray thee, hear me: I will give thee money for the field;
take it of me, and I will bury my dead there.
Genesis 23:14 And Ephron answered Abraham, saying unto him,
Genesis 23:15 My lord, hearken unto me: the land is worth four hundred shekels of
silver; what is that betwixt me and thee? bury therefore thy dead.
Genesis 23:16 And Abraham hearkened unto Ephron; and Abraham weighed to Ephron the
silver, which he had named in the audience of the sons of Heth, four hundred shekels
of silver, current money with the merchant.
8. I will give thee money for the field
Christians are the biggest “sponges”
I know. Three times Ephron attempted to give the cave and field free to Abraham. What
would most "Christians" have done? They would have grabbed it up. They call what
they do “being a Jew” or “getting a deal” or “being a good
steward.” Father Abraham paid well for what he got. He never attempted to cheat or be
unfair or get it for a cheaper price.
Added to this, Abraham and Ephron were friends.
We expect a “deal” from our friends. We would say, “Come on Ephron, cut the
price a little for your old buddy Abraham.” Not Abraham the friend of God and the
father of the seed of faith.
Ephron offered it free. Most of us would have grabbed it up and then say something like,
“The Lord gave this land to me.” Not Abraham. He knew it belonged to Ephron and
Abraham would pay full price for it. Abraham did not barter and “Jew” Ephron
down on the price. Abraham pulled out the silver and weighed to Ephron the amount.
This is one reason Abraham was seen as a mighty
prince among the heathen. It amazes me the crummy witness that many Christians have
concerning finances. Many do not pay their bills and are so “tight” with their
little money that they squeak. I remember years ago that I once played golf at a course
that gave preachers a discount. I liked that and when I moved to the city where I now
pastor I went to play golf at a course in a neighboring community. I asked the owner if he
gave a discount to preachers. He was in no way impressed that I was a preacher and said a
few words that I will not repeat. He then said something like, “I should charge
preachers extra to play here.” Taken back by his attitude toward preachers I hushed
and got into the golf cart and went to hole number one. However, I was forced to think
about the event and the witness I had given to this man who obviously had an already bad
opinion of preachers. I had given him an even worse picture of a Christian. He made his
lively hood at his golf course. I had tried to cheapen the course and take from his
income. I determined that I would try never to give that picture again.
Christians should pay the best and the most. I
have heard several waitresses say that “Christians” are the worst of all
tippers. Waitresses make their living on tips. We should tip the best and we should have
the best. This was the attitude of Father Abraham. He was not cheap and was not a sponge.
Can you imagine attempting to talk the Lord
“down” on our tithes. It doesn’t work that way and we know it. We know what
the Lord expects and we give it. If you will notice, great men and women of God were not
cheap. This is especially true with their giving to the Lord. David said it this way,
2 Samuel 24:24 And the king said unto Araunah, Nay; but I will surely buy
it of thee at a price: neither will I offer burnt offerings unto the LORD my God of that
which doth cost me nothing. So David bought the threshingfloor and the oxen for fifty
shekels of silver.
Kingdom people should stop being sponges and
looked upon as cheap. Don’t buy it if you can’t afford it, but when you can
afford it get the best and pay for it.
Genesis 23:17 And the field of Ephron which was in Machpelah, which was
before Mamre, the field, and the cave which was therein, and all the trees that were in
the field, that were in all the borders round about, were made sure
Genesis 23:18 Unto Abraham for a possession in the presence of the children of Heth,
before all that went in at the gate of his city.
9. all the borders round about, were made sure
Abraham did it legally. He made it “sure”.
Another lesson we learn is to make things “sure.” Today we should get
what we expect in writing. We should acquire some type of legal document. Most Christians
are weak in legalities. We think people will honor their word and do what they say they
are going to do. This is not true even when one believer is dealing with another believer.
Make it sure. So many misconceptions and hurts can be avoided when we make it sure.
Abraham did the deal before witnesses. The borders were well known and marked. It was
clear who had what and who was to do what.
Abraham paid quickly and in full and on time.
Abraham left no place for a bad report. He was a mighty prince of a man.
Genesis 23:19 And after this, Abraham buried Sarah his wife in
the cave of the field of Machpelah before Mamre: the same is Hebron in the land of Canaan.
10. Abraham buried Sarah his wife
As sad as it is, one spouse will bury the
other. It is not something we think about when we are young. We do think more about it as
we age. Again we note the endearment of the man and his companion and helpmeet. The Holy
Spirit lovingly writes, “Abraham buried Sarah his wife”.
11. What we learn from this lesson that we can apply to our lives today.
A. Every marriage will experience numerous and serious problems. Few marriages will
experience what Abraham’s and Sarah’s marriage experienced. Abraham and Sarah
prove that a marriage will experience problems, but only death can separate the couple.
B. Abraham mourned and weeped for Sarah. He came to mourn and weep for Sarah. Believers
often attempt to comfort by saying the deceased is “in a better place, or “with
the Lord,” etc. True comfort only comes after mourning and weeping works its healing.
C. After mourning and weeping, the kingdom person must stand up from the dead and move on.
Remaining in mourning and weeping is dangerous to the body, soul, and spirit.
D. Abraham was seen as a mighty prince by his neighbors. How do our neighbors see us?
E. “Christians” are often cheap. We often ruin our witness by the way we handle
our finances. We should pay the best and have the best.
F. Abraham made the deal for Machpelah “sure.” He made it legal and binding. We
today need to make our arrangements “sure.” We tend to “take the word”
of a person and the end is often very unpleasant.
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